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Report on Are You a Complainer?
Smart girls decide for themselves™.
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This survey was posted in April 2008 and asked questions about complaining. Of the 400 of you who responded, 368 were girls, 16 were boys and 16 didn't indicate a gender. You came from many different places and backgrounds. Let's take a look at the quick trends we picked up on from your survey results:
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You guys pegged your family members as the biggest complainers - siblings were ranked #1 when asked who complains the most, with parents coming in at #2. Friends placed right behind. And when you hear people complaining, plenty of you (112) told us it makes you feel annoyed, but a good number of you (217) said it depends on who the complainer is and what they're complaining about.
How do you handle complainers? Many of you either just listen to what they have to say or try to think of a way to fix the situation.
You said friends complain most about schoolwork and their classmates, while parents complain most about housework and money.
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| When you complain, who do you complain to? |
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| Looks like you guys complain to friends the most. |
When it comes to yourselves, you indicated you complain most about schoolwork, relationships and classmates, in that order.
And as for what you think of complaining on a whole, you're pretty split. Lots of you see complaining as a waste of time, while lots of you think it's natural, since everyone needs to vent sometimes.
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| How do you feel after you complain? |
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| Many of you think complaining doesn't make you feel any differently. |
You couldn't agree on whether it's right or wrong to complain about friends. Some of you (88) said it's absolutely wrong to complain about a friend - that it's immature and unhelpful. Another 138 agree that it's wrong unless that friend did or said something really obnoxious, and 115 only think it's wrong if it causes a lot of drama. Finally, 40 said it isn't wrong unless the complainer is complaining to someone who is friends with the person they're complaining about!
Have you guys heard someone complaining about you? A big number - 249 - said you definitely have, while 119 weren't sure and 32 didn't think so. Hearing that made you guys feel annoyed and angry, but it also opened your eyes to something you were doing that was bothering other people.
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We asked, "What's your biggest complaint about school?" You said:
~ "How strict my teachers are."
~ "Ignorant people."
~ "Friends feel like enemies not friends! And ugh! One word: drama!"
~ "Too many tests, too much homework."
~ "The teachers' attitudes toward students - we are not 2."
~ "The stairs."
~ "Our dress code."
~ "The unearthly hour at which I have to get out of bed."
Then we asked, "What's your biggest complaint about love and relationships?" You said:
~ "There are a lot of emotional ups and downs."
~ "Guys are too stereotypical and shallow."
~ "I've never had a boyfriend or even kissed a guy."
~ "My girlfriend lives so far away and she likes her best friend."
~ "My crush can't date!!!!!"
~ "I wish I could talk to the boy I like, but he's older, so it won't happen. If it did, then I would get trampled by 8th grade girls."
~ "I don't know anyone who I'd even have a chance with (I'm gay and everyone I know is straight) so my love life hasn't got a chance to exist."
~ "No one gives each other a chance to be together."
Next, we asked, "What's your biggest complaint about your family??" You said:
~ "They're always complaining about my room!"
~ "All my brother does is complain and he always gets his way! Then all my parents talk about is money. Yes, it is important but it is very tiring."
~ "They really annoy me sometimes - it's like they don't understand me at all!"
~ "They nag all the time - it's so frustrating!"
~ "It seems like I disappoint them a lot."
~ "My sister's annoyingness."
Finally, we asked, "What's your biggest complaint about your friends??" You said: ~ "One of them won't stop putting me down constantly."
~ "They talk about everyone and everything."
~ "Superiority complexes."
~ "Why are some of them pretending to be something else?"
~ "I always seem to be the one who makes arrangements to see the few friends I have. I feel like if I didn't keep in touch with them, we'd lose contact altogether."
~ "They're incapable of having a political discussion."
~ "Some of my friends are really boy crazy."
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So how did it feel to write out those complaints? For 169, it made you feel the same, you didn't notice any change. But for 94 of you, it felt pretty good to get them out of your system. Another 78 said you hadn't realized you needed to get those complaints off your chest, though 16 said writing them out made you feel horrible and made you dwell on them more. It's interesting how different people react in different ways.
So is complaining good or bad? Based on this survey, it seems like it could go either way!
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Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts
with us!
Please remember that all web-based polls
are not scientific because the pollsters cannot randomly select the
respondents to participate in the surveys.
All our surveys are anonymous; check out our privacy
policy. All data copyright 1996-2007.
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