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Results for 01/06/2006 to 01/25/2006

Last week, Alexa said:

"I'm Bisexual and I've Thought About Suicide

I've been bisexual for three years and I'm lonely and depressed. I don't have anyone to talk to, as in a gay friend or a girlfriend or boyfriend. What do I do?"

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662 SmartGirls replied:

7%	Try talking to friends you already have. Who knows? Maybe some of them have feelings similar to yours. If not, your friends who are not bisexual or gay can still be there for you and support you, even though they may not understand exactly what you're going through.
8%	Try looking on the Internet for chat rooms or message boards for gay and bisexual youth. Although you won't be talking to anyone in person, people will still understand what you are going through. Maybe you'll even meet someone your age who feels the same way and deals with situations a lot like yours.
10%	Wait until you find someone you can trust enough to share your feelings with, especially if you are really unsure of how your friends or others around you will react. In the meantime, be proud of who you are and keep a journal to write your feelings and thoughts in. Hopefully, you will meet someone you can trust and be open with soon.
19%	It is really hard to be bisexual or gay and feel like you don't have any friends you can talk to about it. There are a lot of people going through the same thing you are, though. Perhaps you could try finding an LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) youth support group in your community - most cities (and more and more smaller towns) have LGBT centers where they offer youth support. Not only might you find a really supportive setting, but you might also make a whole new group of friends who understand how you feel.

56% gave other responses. Some SmartGirls said:

I'm bisexual myself, and while I found it really hard at first it's become easier. Honestly, from what you've said, unless you didn't include something else in your letter, it sounds like more of a clinical problem than a difficulty with your sexuality. Try talking to a counselor or a school nurse. With a school nurse or medical practitioner, what you say in a room stays in that room so you can be sure of privacy. If you've thought about suicide you really should get help now or call a suicide hotline. Hope you feel better and best of luck!
I know a lot of people who have just come out and they felt the same way as you for a while. When they came out, they - and I - were surprised at how many of our friends were the same way or had at least questioned their sexuality. Now my friend who was most concerned about coming out is completely fine with it. You just have to get up the bravery to tell your friends. If they're really your friends, they'll support you.
Alexa, a lot people have gone through the same feelings as you. If you cannot find any people like you, try making new friends. Don't exactly throw at them that you're bi, but elude the truth from them, unless you know that you've found someone you can trust. Only tell one person at a time and tell your parents - they might be shocked at first but remember, they will always love you.
As a bisexual myself, I found that it was difficult to talk to people about it. I didn't want to say anything, figuring that they wouldn't really understand and they'd feel weird around me. But I poked around a bit after the loneliness got to me. I was 14 when I figured it out. Well, my best advice is to research and look for bisexual communities and talk with those people. It takes a real pressure off of you.
Hi Alexa. You have nothing to be ashamed of, you're you and it shouldn't make you feel like this. Suicide isn't the answer - you have everything to live for and going for you. Tell a trusted adult or maybe you should speak to a counselor, you can do both in confidentiality. Don't commit sucide, don't run away from your problems - people can help you. If you're really unsure, call ChildLine. Kate, age 15
Well, try not to single yourself out about being a bisexual. You're just the same as everyone else! If your friends are good friends they'll help you and give you advice!
First, are you sure you're bisexual? If so, don't think about the negative things. Think about the positive. Yes, you're different - be proud. Yes, you don't have any friends at the moment, but why not make some? You should never resort to suicide, even in really bad situations - I know, I've tried it. But think for a minute - how would your parents/guardian feel if you were dead?
Hey, I'm an active member of my school's GSA (Gay-Straight Alliance), so I know firsthand that the kids in GSA are awesome. They'll be glad to meet you and they'll accept you for who you are... and the best part is that you can help out others like yourself! My GSA did a protest on Martin Luther King Jr. Day to raise awareness for peace and the GSA. There are also contests for gay/bi/ally writers all over the place. Don't give up on the world - sometimes you just have to look around a little more carefully to find a group of people you'll really connect with. So yeah, look for a GSA. They'll have students your age, too.
I'm also a bisexual and I don't have anyone to talk to about it because nobody understands... finally I just came out to somebody that I trusted. If you have a really good friend, talk to them. If they really love you (as a good friend or maybe more) then they won't care and they will be there for you. Tamara, 14
Always believe in yourself - no one can tell you otherwise. DeVaughn 14
Hey Alexa, I have been in your situation about suicide. The only thing to do is to think about all the people who love you and who would miss you.
All the best and good luck, Angelina, 12
Everything will be okay:)

Thanks to all of you that gave your advice! Please give your advice for this week's issue.

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